


A broken couple.

by ohmerthurcharm



Series: The Captain's treasure. [3]
Category: Merlin (TV)
Genre: Anger, Boys Kissing, Break Up, Cold Arthur at times, Comforting Arthur Pendragon (Merlin), Dialogue Heavy, Fainting, Healing, Heavy topics, History, Implied Mpreg, Issues, M/M, Not so good choices, Relationship Discussions, Stress, Talking, communicating, dark themes, drugged, hand holding, toxic
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-10-19
Updated: 2019-10-19
Packaged: 2020-12-24 08:35:40
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,263
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21096542
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ohmerthurcharm/pseuds/ohmerthurcharm
Summary: Merlin waits for the Captain and who walks through the door is someone he thought he'd never see again.





	A broken couple.

**Author's Note:**

> The character's discuss heavy themes, they make bad choices. It's not meant to be romanticised. It's meant to be dark and troubling but they also want to work through the issues. They're both trying to heal. That said, i hope you enjoy! :)

Merlin sits at the dinner table, looking around quietly. The room was dimly lit and was beautifully decorated with fine cloth. A glass chandelier hung in the middle of the room, glittering softly in the light. 

He looked at the feast laid out in front of him. It could feed more than two people, easy. 

He blinked slowly, feeling exhausted again. Gaius said it was to be expected from the trauma. It’s what kept him mostly in his sleeping quarter. Resting, always resting. Gaius said to not feel guilty about it, but he wanted to go out and explore, meet people and try and move on, but it was all too much. 

Suddenly the door slid open, lighting up the room brightly for a moment before it closed again. 

It was quiet but Merlin could hear breathing, he rubbed his eyes sleepily and looked up slowly. 

There stood a man he thought he’d never see again.

He stared with wide eyes. 

“Can’t be.” He whispered and slowly stood, shaking his head. “You’re…” He gasped lightly, tears welling up. 

“Merlin…” The man said, his voice deeper than the last time they met.

“Oh my gods…what…did…oh…oh gods.” He felt dizzy and pressed his hand against the table, trembling now. He was frowning. 

The man hesitantly moved closer. 

“You’re the…captain.” Merlin slurred out. “Oh, of course you are…” His eyes went blank then. 

“Merlin.” The Captain said, pain in his voice and hesitantly rested his hand on the man’s back and with that, Merlin crumpled. 

__

Merlin blinked slowly, staring up at the Captain, he felt soft sheets against his hot skin. 

“Oh good, you’re awake.” He states, sitting beside him on a chair by the bed. 

“Where am I?” Merlin asks. 

“In my personal sleeping quarters.” The Captain states. “Gaius said to take it easy today.”

“No doubt…” Merlin said calmly. “Did he drug me?”

“Yes…I advised against it. Gaius told me you needed it. Water?” The Captain asked and poured a small amount in as Merlin sat up and drank slowly. 

Merlin tapped the cup lightly with his finger and looked at him. “I still can’t believe it.”

“I know…it’s an…awkward situation.” The Captain shifted. 

“I never thought i’d see you again…I thought it was over.” Merlin said and frowned lightly. “Wait, the boy…”

“Let’s not jump the gun here…let’s talk about what’s just happened. Gaius said you suffer from exhaustion and dizzy spells…why did you agree to dine with me in such poor conditions?” The Captain asked. 

“I felt fine until the dinner…” Merlin said, biting back an apology. 

“I see…well, I guess there’s nothing more to say about that then…” The Captain states. “Are you okay…with me being here?”

“We have to talk about it sometime…and I’m so drugged, I don’t think I can get angry.” Merlin states. 

It was quiet. 

“I’m sorry…uh. There are so many things I want to say, to ask…but let’s go back yes?” The Captain asked. 

“Where you drugged too then? You’re awfully calm.” Merlin says. 

“I guess time…heals…maybe not everything but right now, I’m happy to talk about anything.” The Captain states. 

“Gods, where to start…” Merlin breaths. 

“Some place easy. Or easier. Let’s not go to us just yet, although we might eventually go there, so much of what’s happened is tied to what we did…” The Captain said. 

“Yes…” Merlin gulps and drinks the rest. 

“Let’s start with the ship. I read Gaius’s report on it. I’m sorry you lost your ship and crew.” The Captain states. 

“I’m sorry too…it might not be as big or as fancy as yours, but it was mine, I was at the height of my career…a Captain. I guess I have you to thank for that. But I really loved that ship…the crew. To have it all gone…I’ve lost myself in the process.” Merlin states. 

“It’s to be expected.” The Captain says. 

“Are you trying to comfort me?” Merlin asks, half smiling.

“Maybe…” The Captain states, his lips spreading into a thin line. 

Merlin takes a deep breath and sighs. “I uh…there’s so many questions. How did you get my signal? The destress one?”

“Gods, Merlin…do you know how far out you were in deep space?” The Captain asked. 

“No…we jumped but…how far?” Merlin asked. 

“Fucking far. So far that…I’m actually thinking it wasn’t a coincidence that we were close enough to hear it. It was fate and you know me; I usually call bullshit with fate. You were so far that I was in awe we even got the message in the first place. That’s technology for you, it’s improved so much over the years. You were in a very dangerous place; I can’t stress that enough. Merlin…” The Captain moves in his chair slightly, grunting and looks at the man firmly. 

“What?” Merlin asks. 

“The planet…you were in…the one you left so quickly, it was amazing how fast your ship left the atmosphere…a place with…vast mountains, massive planet-” The Captain said slowly.

“-Get to the point, Arthur.” Merlin said firmly. 

Arthur sighs. “Merlin…when you jumped…you went off course, very off course. You jumped deep into space…a dangerous place. The planet you landed in. It wasn’t a planet. It was a ship, a huge…hulking ship. Old and decrepit. Merlin…it was a fucking cesspool of monsters and creatures. The ‘mother’ of the ship hypnotized you and the crew to go there. It was all a big lie, no mountains, just a ship. It was huge…well known too. They draw people in…invade their bodies and use them as hosts for food. The hosts go in and all hell breaks loose. At first, I didn’t want to let you in. I thought…why would one person, the only one to survive not be affected? I didn’t want to bring in an infected body onto this ship…but then I saw the footage, I saw you and I knew why…your magic stopped all kinds of diseases and you’re too quick for any creature to get inside of you. So, I allowed you on…” 

Merlin nods. “Thank you…gods I…I was so scared, Arthur.”

“I know…” Arthur attempted to hold Merlin’s hand but forced himself not to. 

“Thank you for saving my life.” Merlin smiled.

“You would have done the same for me, considering what happened between us…I know that deep down, we have each other’s backs.” 

“Until I get diseased or used as a host.” Merlin teased. 

Arthur groaned. “Merlin, please…”

“It’s just a joke, Arthur.” Merlin says.

Arthur rubs his face, quiet. “I’m sorry for…. what you went through, truly.”

Merlin nods, quiet. “Thank you.”

Arthur smiles lightly. 

Merlin blinks slowly. “So…Captain huh?”

“Yeah…father died a few years back…” Arthur gulped. 

“The kid?” Merlin asked.

Arthur looked down, fiddling with his mother’s ring. 

“Don’t feel bad, Arthur…we were over…long over. Who were they?” Merlin asks. 

Arthur shook his head, quiet, tears were welling up in his eyes. 

“Arthur?” Merlin asks and frowns. “What’s wrong?”

“He’s yours.” Arthur whispers, sniffing and looks down firmly.

“The kid?” Merlin asks. “Mine…uh…Ours?”

Arthur nods and looks up. “Yeah…” He whispers out.

Merlin stares at him, quiet and shocked. “How?”

Arthur played with his hands. “Gods, Merlin…I’m so sorry.”

“Arthur.” Merlin says firmly. 

The Captain sighed, biting his lip. “Merlin I was so stupid…”

“What did you do?” Merlin asked, sweat started to glisten on his skin. 

“I got drunk…like…rat arsed drunk and I….fuck, I…went to the hospital ward, the old one remember? I found your sperm and…I just…I used it, Merlin. The sperm you so proudly donated. You’re a clever and kind man, I understand why you’d want to give your sperm out there…I…” Arthur gulped thickly. “I was stupid and I wasn’t thinking and…I missed you at the end of the day…Somehow, in my fucked up head of mine, I thought having your baby would change things.”

Merlin just stared, shocked. 

“I didn’t want to tell you…we had broken up and…I thought it wasn’t really any of your business. I made the choice and that was that.” Arthur took in a shaky breath. “I was angry and hurt…I just wanted some…fucking part of you. Nothing was clear…the next day, I started to realize what I had done, but it was too late.” 

“You…made yourself pregnant…with my sperm I had donated…” Merlin frowned. 

“Yes.” Arthur whispered. “I regretted it…afterwards. I was being so fucking stupid but Gaius said there wasn’t anything I could do to get rid of the sperm. The tech was…and I…it was too late. Twenty four hours passed and I couldn’t do anything without risking my health in the process.”

“I’ve heard you had the latest technology when it came to giving birth.” Merlin said in a monotone voice. “It’s strict and…that’s why it’s locked and secured and only given to people who desperately want a child, how did you get access?”

“I’m the Captain’s son, or was. Actually, father was already on the way out so I was already acting Captain soon after we broke up. My keys and log work with any passwords, it overrides the other’s.” Arthur states. “I was off the walls upset at that point. I couldn’t think straight…I was spiralling into this hell hole…” Arthur gulped. “I was scared to tell you…”

“You…did all of this on your own?” Merlin asked. 

“No, Gaius helped me through it.” Arthur stated. “You know the…the uh…process is faster now. Six months…I went on a break, well deserved to be honest, I would have ruined everything.”

Merlin frowned. “But…you broke up with me at the end, yes it became mutual but...”

“I know! I know…I fucked up, badly.” Arthur sighed. “But…Merlin…you have to understand how sorry I am, for not telling you.”

“That’s why I felt so connected to the boy.” Merlin mumbled. 

Arthur shifted. “Merlin?”

The man looked at him. 

“I just…want to tell you. When I uh, gave birth…I loved the kid…I just…I looked at the little baby just…wailing in the nurse’s arms…fighting so hard and crying…he was so strong and brave…I loved that kid so fucking much. Yes, I regret how it happened…but, fuck…I love my boy, Merlin. I love my son, so much.” Arthur breathes out. 

Merlin nodded. “Can I see him again?”

Arthur nodded. “I’m just so sorry it happened that way.”

Merlin frowned and reached over, holding his hand. “I think at the end of it all, we hurt each other…badly.”

Arthur nodded, sniffing. “Wasn’t the best break up now was it?”

“No…and I’m sorry for hurting your feeling’s like that.” Merlin said. 

“No, you were right…If you kept in contact with me…I would have…you know, felt like there was hope…for us.” Arthur admitted. “It had to be done.”

Merlin stared at him sadly. “I loved you, you know…very much.”

Arthur smiled and nodded. “I know…we just…we weren’t right for each other be it at the time or forever…” He gulped and paused. “Also even if we had stayed in contact…you were a Captain…I was soon to be one. It was best for us to not speak, yes…it hurt but…it was the right thing…”

Merlin smiled. “Arthur Pendragon, you’ve really…grown into a different man…”

Arthur grins, chuckling. “On that note.” Arthur said and pulled something out from a cupboard. “Remember these?”

Arthur handed Merlin a drink with the Pendragon logo on it to the side of the drink’s branding name.

“My gods, this takes me back…did…no, did you buy the company?” Merlin grinned and opened it up, drinking happily. 

“Yup…it was liquidating so I thought I’d give them a hand, best drinks in the whole galaxy…couldn’t let them go.” Arthur smiled. 

“My gods this brings me back…remember when we’d hang out in your dorm and drink these? Drinking and talking shit?” Merlin grinned. 

“The good ol’ days…right?” Arthur grinned, drinking too. “I swear, if this had alcohol, that company would be very popular.”

“Your father was so tight with alcohol, wasn’t he? Even kicking out star pupils if there were even seen with fucking beer.” Merlin stated. 

“He was a stubborn asshole…that’s for sure.” Arthur said. 

Merlin licked his lips. “Sorry.”

“Don’t be…I mean, I loved my father but he was an ass…how he treated you….us…It made me feel sick.” Arthur sighed and gulped down the rest before putting it aside. 

“It was really fun though…uni…us just…fucking around during out breaks or at night…doing projects together. It was the happiest days of my life.” Merlin smiled. 

“I’m sure it was…especially in the showers.” Arthur purred. 

Merlin burst out laughing. “Oh gods…I remember…that was incredible.”

“Yeah.” Arthur smiled. “You hungry?”

“No, not yet…” Merlin said, giggling. “You?”

Arthur shook his head, grinning. “I…i’m so glad to see you again, Merlin.”

Merlin smiled. “Likewise, Captain Pendragon of the most…esteemed fleet of the known universe.”

Arthur chuckled. “Come on, enough with the flattery, you know how it makes me feel.”

“I guess you’re right, your head is already inflating as we speak.” Merlin smiled, holding the now empty bottle close to his chest. 

Arthur shook his head. “It’s amazing how comfortable we are with each other isn’t it? Even after all that…and these years.”

“Fuck, how long has it been?” Merlin asked. 

Arthur blew out a sigh. “Probably…uh…eleven years now?”

“It felt…longer.” Merlin says.

Arthur nods. “A lot happens in eleven years.”

Merlin nods. “I never forgot you, you know…you’d always pop in my head…”

Arthur looked at him quietly, feeling like he just entered dangerous territory. 

Merlin nodded and looked away. “You know…when I was running around…in that damn ship…I was…” He blinked, sniffing. “I was hoping you’d just come out from the shadows, with your gun…and that confident look in your eyes…that I’d know that…everything was going to be okay. I imagined you there by my side, talking to me…keeping me calm…I know, it’s stupid but I was so scared.” 

“Merlin…” Arthur says.

“I know, i’m sorry…but you saved me didn’t you?” Merlin smiled happily. 

“Yeah…” Arthur says, feeling his cheeks heating up, he felt himself moving closer. 

“I…how far were you…from my wreckage?” Merlin asked. 

“Far but…close enough to jump over to you…We were experimenting with our new weapons you see, deep space has so many creepy shit in it…we’d just go around and blast any creature we saw…bad ones of course, face huggers, you name it…” Arthur says. “We’re actually going to collect some money cuz of it…we were on an old abandoned route that people want to use again, we…cleared it out you see…people are grateful and are giving us money for the trouble…a win…win in my book, I’d say.” 

Merlin nods. “Thank you…for reacting to it, I mean, you’re Arthur…your noble…you’d always answer a call but…I’m still happy…so happy.”

Arthur smiled, staring into Merlin’s eyes deeply. 

Merlin shook his head lightly, looking away. “I thought I was a goner, you know me…I hate killing and worse than that, I hate those creatures…it would have been the worst death for me.”

“I know…” Arthur whispered, holding Merlin’s hand, his thumb rubbing Merlin’s knuckles gently. 

Merlin looked at him quietly. “I missed you.”

Arthur leaned in, kissing him softly. 

Merlin kissed back, taking his hand away from the bottle and held onto Arthur’s arm. 

Arthur moved so he was straddling Merlin’s hips, lying Merlin against the bed and moved the bottle off and onto the table before stroking his cheek. 

“We were both so stupid and young…” Merlin whispered. “I made so many mistakes…”

Arthur watched him. “I had so many issues…not just with you or me…but with my father, my crew…the ship. I was scared…I thought I wasn’t ready.”

Merlin sighed sadly. “You’ve been ready for so long, you just didn’t know it yet.”

Arthur smiled. “You were always so sure of me, weren’t you? Loyal Merlin…brave and kind.”

Merlin chuckled. “You were a prat who always dragged me into trouble…”

Arthur smiled. “You liked it, admit it…”

Merlin nodded. “Yeah, I did…”

Arthur leaned in, kissing his cheek and neck softly. “I thought of you too…”

Merlin sighed happily, closing his eyes. “Yeah?”

“I’d imagine you coming to my ship…as co-captain…we’d work together…I…felt so alone without you sometimes…” Arthur stroked Merlin’s hair, pulling away. 

“Arthur…”

“I know, i’m sorry…” Arthur sighed. “But you’re here now…”

Merlin looked at him sadly then. “I’m no Captain anymore…”

“We don’t know that yet, Cenred could be in contact in a matter of days…” Arthur said. 

Merlin nods lightly, not believing him. “I’m beginning to wonder if he ever will…”

“What do you mean?” Arthur asked. 

“You know me…Arthur…I’m shit with new tech, I hate it.” Merlin said quietly.

“Your point?” Arthur asked.

“Cenred always kept up to date with tech…but with my ship, it was cheap, he couldn’t sell it either…the crew were good but not as good as his elite. We were all paid less, I didn’t mind, I was a new Captain after all, fresh from Uni. We did the dirty work with crappy systems…we did everything the old way. He didn’t much care for us…I don’t think he gave a damn about us…I think the mission was to get us killed, we were a thorn at his side. I was just a fresh Captain with a good crew…in a shite ship…traveling with bad equipment. Naked to the supernatural…I think it was a suicide mission and we were all too proud to admit it.” Merlin said sadly. 

Arthur frowned, watching him. “Gods Merlin.” He breathed out and then growled. “Cenred has a tendency to…loose his crew a lot now that I think about it, all the low ranking ones too.”

Merlin sighed. 

“I was so blind…I knew you liked old tech so…I thought you would be happy in your ship…I didn’t think…and we weren’t talking…” Arthur frowned. 

“Arthur don’t blame yourself.” Merlin said firmly. “Look at me.”

Arthur looked at him, breathing hard. 

“It’s not your fault. It had nothing to do with you, understand?” Merlin said. 

“But I cared for you, why didn’t I investigate further?” Arthur asked. 

“Arthur…why should you?” Merlin asked. 

“Because it’s the right thing to do, isn’t it?” Arthur asked. 

Merlin smiled sadly. “I don’t blame you and you shouldn’t either.” 

Arthur frowned. “Why do you have such faith in me?”

“You’re a good person, no one saw it coming with Cenred…just leave it Arthur, I’m here now.” Merlin said and stroked his cheek, drawing him closer. “I’m here now.”

Arthur held him tightly. “I won’t let you go, not again.”

“I don’t plan to go.” Merlin confessed. 

Arthur sighed in relief and kissed his head softly.


End file.
